I made a quick trip to Western North Carolina to join more than 50 friends and family at the 2025 Mackey Reunion. (Unfortunately, Sue, still recovering from Covid, couldn’t accompany me.)

The Mackeys first came to Weaverville, Buncombe Country, North Carolina early in the 19th century and settled in the northern part of the county in and around Weaverville. Our branch of the Mackey family has been gathering for nearly 50 years, starting when my “Granny Mackey” was still alive and reigned as the matriarch of the Mackey Clan.

I think Granny would be delighted and happy to know that so many of her progeny showed up–this was the best turnout in years. She and my grandfather had eleven children, six girls and five boys, over the course of twenty years. There were forty in my generation of cousins, and I don’t know how many great grandchildren and great great grandchildren there are now.

Weaverville, NC is situated in the rolling hills of North Buncombe, CO; in my opinion some of the prettiest country around, though it is just now recovering from the devastation of Hurricane Helene which wreaked havoc in the area, not quite a a year ago now in September 2024.

My cousin Paul kindly drove me all over the countryside to show me the damage that had been done by the storm. Many people, although fortunately no one in the immediate family, are still waiting to receive the assistance they need to rebuild and restart their lives.

My mother, Carlie (now 97) and two sisters, Isabel (99) and Marie (88), are the only ones of the children still with us. Mom and Aunt Marie attended the reunion, along with much of their extended families.

This year all of my siblings planned to attend, but my sister, Glenda, who was to chauffeur Mom, was laid low with a severe sinus infection, leaving her with fatigue and vertigo. My brother Dale & his wife Carrie brought Mom instead, and my sister Sandy & her daughter Sarah took her home. My nephew Glenn and his wife, Garland, and their two children, Art & Harvey came on their own. They have been some of the most consisten attendees at past reunions. Mom was in 7th Heaven and it was great fun for us all, but we missed not having Glenda with us.

The Clauhs children, Freddy, Paul, Bobby, Laurie & Margaret, really have played a vital role in keeping the reunion going these last few years. I can’t thank them enough for their thoughtfulness and hard work in providing this wonderful opportunity for all of us Mackey Descendents.

Aunt Bell who will turn 99 on September 28th was not able to attend, but some of us visited with her after the reunion. She now lives in a care facility and doesn’t get out much, but she remains a feisty and an entertaining conversationalist and raconteur.

She had us laughing and hanging on her stories throughout our visit–despite her hearing problems. We reluctantly had to leave after more than an hour visiting. I am just astounded by her mental acuity and cheerfulness. I have to ask myself that if I live so long, will I be as alert and sociable?

It would not have been easy for me to attend the reunion without my cousin, Tracie Mackey & her husband, Jimmy Emory, who picked me up at the Asheville airport; Aunt Marie & Uncle Fred, who hosted me Friday evening and provided a scrumptious southern supper of ham, green beans, creamed corn & potato salad, all lovingly made by Aunt Marie; and Patty & Bobby Clauhs who hosted me Saturday evening at their mountain cabin, fed me & then carried me back to the airport on Sunday morning. Bobby and I stayed up after Patty went to bed, sitting around a campfire Saturday night, talking, catching up, and recalling family stories until a passing rain storm finally drove us in.

Thanks to all of you!

It was a very short, but action packed, visit. I loved the reunion and loved re-connecting with family, many of whom I had not seen for years & years. I especially liked seeing the youngest cousins.

I haven’t mentioned everyone who came–I probably didn’t even talk to everyone who was there, but the experienced has warmed my heart beyond description.

Now that Charlie is a teenager, we often don’t see him as much as we would like, although during the school year, he would have us pick him and his buddy, Dylan, up after school at least once a week. Maybe it’s because we are always good for a fast food foray. They were almost always voracious and wanted to stop at Panera, McDonald’s, or their current favorite, Taco Bell, We don’t mind, as long as we can be along for the ride.

As many of you know, Charlie has been break dancing since he was about six; he is very diligent about it, attending class usually a couple of times a week and practicing at home. Just as school was letting out for the summer, he participated in a Cypher which we got to attend. We certainly think he was one of the best there; if you want to see Charlie dancing, click here: Charlie at a B Boy Cypher

Thanks to a friend of the family who does PR for a local TV channel, Charlie had the opportunity to visit a studio and make a short promo video for the summer movie release, Freakier Friday. We were his ride and got to watch the filming. The people at the channel could not have been more welcoming. Not sure Charlie has a TV career in his future, but everyone, including Charlie, had fun. Click Denver Freakier Friday for the video.

If it’s a board–snowboard, surfboard, or skateboard Charlie is game. This summer as in previous summers, Charlie got to fly to Florida to visit with his other grandparents, and once again go surfing in the Atlantic. Later that same visit, he and his Dad, did a skateboarding tour of Miami. What a lucky guy!

There’s always time for a getaway with his Mom as well, whether it’s a baseball game or a weekend in Glenwood Springs.

Any day spent with Charlie is a good day for his Oma and Opa. We can’t believe that he is 13 and has just started the 8th Grade…where has the time gone? Wasn’t it just last summer when we took him to Rocky Mountain National Park?

This week Sue and I visited the Denver Botanic Gardens and as always enjoyed ourselves immensely. It’s late spring in Denver; the beauty of the gardens truly make you happy to be alive!

Denver’s Botanic Garden is extraordinary. For the last number of years we have purchased a family pass, and we are never disappointed when we visit, no matter what the season.

We walked around the garden for a couple of hours, marveling at the profusion of blooms–the irises, poppies, and peonies were particularly beautiful on the day of our visit. We were certainly not the only visitors, but along with sightseeing, we were able to take a break for a picnic on a bench in a secluded wooded area.

I took a lot of pictures (80+), but I won’t inflict them on all on you, but with your indulgence, I would like to share some of them with you.

On this Memorial Day please take some time to reflect on the beauties of nature, man’s handiwork, and the sacrifices that many Veterans have made for our country. Let us all honor their sacrifice and do all that we can to preserve our democracy.

Often the highlight of our week is Tuesday Afternoon with our grandson, Charlie, and his best friend and “our adopted grandson, ” Dylan. Each Tuesday, we meet them at Skinner Middle School, where they are both in the 7th Grade. Charlie and Dylan have known each other since pre-school and have always had a a special bond. Unfortunately, this year, although they are in the same middle school, they don’t share many classes together, so they, like us, seem to look forward to Tuesday afternoons. Their parents tell us how much the boys enjoy it and are disappointed if the get-together doesn’t happen.

The moment they pile into our car, the conversation about where to go for a “snack” begins. Lately, Taco Bell has been the favored choice, but McDonald’s, Panera, 7-11, and even Hapa, a favorite sushi restaurant, figure in the running. Then after that is decided, we discuss what are we going to do. Often, during the winter, it was going to our apartment and playing five card stud–or gambling as they like to call it. Last Tuesday after a $30 Taco Bell snack for all of us, the boys unanimously decided that we should revisit the Denver Museum of Illusion.

Since a visit requires a lot of walking and standing, Sue opted out, but the museum doesn’t allow anyone under 15 to be unaccompanied, and Opa became the designated chaperon or third wheel. I had a good time, mostly watching the boys who thoroughly enjoyed themselves, especially with the help of the museum docents who always have suggestions on how best to interact with each illusion.

Whatever we do, it gives us the opportunity to interact with Charlie and Dylan, find out what they are doing, and share some time together–something that not all of us are granted. Too soon they will outgrow this stage and will no longer willingly spend some time with the grandparents…let’s hope that time is later rather than sooner.

Just got back from a visit with my mother and siblings in North Georgia. It’s always good to see Mom, who will be 97 years old this July, as well as my extended family. Mom lives in a small assisted living facility in Royston, GA, having moved there two years ago.

The past two years since her move there have been a revelation for me about aging in America. An ever greater number of us are living to be very old (85+). Sue will be 81 this year, and I will turn 77 in July. It’s possible we could live into our 90s– not an altogether happy prognosis!

Mom was fortunate to have been able to live on her own until she was 95–thanks to good genes, good health, and, most importantly, having caring and supportive children nearby. She was widowed nearly 20 years ago, but she stayed in her home and did not give up driving, at least around town, until her late 80s. She did a lot for herself, worked as she could in her house and yard, enjoyed watching all the birds that visited her, and worried about her lawn and garden. Every Sunday, she was in her favorite pew at the Methodist Church where she taught Sunday school and served on many committees. The church was an important parts of her life, and her faith remains strong and unshakeable.

I never lived in GA as I was in college when the family moved there upon my father’s retirement from the Navy in 1967, but my three siblings, Sandy, Glenda and Dale are proud Georgians and have all lived near Mom for years . Following Dad’s passing in 2006, Mom lived on her own, but my brother and sisters checked in with her frequently and stopped by to visit, help with chores, and run errands. Over the last decade, she has needed more help with shopping and medical appointments, especially as her macular degeneration progressively worsened.

In the summer of 2023, after a series of falls and fainting spells, Mom herself recognized that the time had come for her to give up her independence. Simultaneously, Glenda, who had been trying unsuccessfully to find a suitable and affordable place for more than a year, came upon what seemed to be the perfect solution: The Gables in Royston, GA, only 15 miles from Mom’s home.

The Gables is a lovely small and reasonably priced facility with 70 or so residents, each in their own apartment. The staff are caring and kind, and Mom was able to move into a two room apartment on short notice. Much of the summer of 2023 was spent in going through Mom’s things and reducing her possessions to the minimum. She shed some tears and fretted over letting go of a life time of memories. That process is hard for everyone, and there are always regrets and second guesses.

Fortunately Mom has been happy and has made friends at the Gables; one of the biggest benefits is that the staff dispense her medicines and eye drops as scheduled, relieving her of the anxiety and worry of having to deal with them herself. Staff clean her apartment and make her bed daily, and they do her laundry as needed. Recently for an additional monthly charge, she has begun to get help bathing and dressing, mostly because of her macular degeneration.

Doctor visits and emergency room trips occur on a frequent basis, and she alway needs someone to accompany her and act as her advocate and amanuensis; that task usually falls on Glenda and Dale, especially since I am 1500 miles away. My siblings visit her frequently, and unlike many of her fellow residents who complain about the lack of visitors, Mom has managed to maintain some longtime friendships. In fact, one of her favorite activities is playing dominoes with a group of lady friends every Friday afternoon–sometimes joined by my brother, Dale. When I visit with Mom, I always look forward to playing (and bantering) with the ladies!

She loves the staff, and it certainly seems as if they love her; but as a resident you give up all privacy and modesty. The staff are in and out of your room many times a day, and bathroom functions often become a communal affair, but this is the exchange you make for peace of mind and necessary care. Mom’s comfortable way of life is in great contrast to that of her 98 year old sister, Isabel.

Unlike Mom, who receives social security and VA benefits (from my Dad’s service in the Navy) and has a small nest egg from the sale of her home, Aunt Bel had few sources to fall back on when it came time to go into a nursing home. So Aunt Bel, having surrendered her social security and government employment pensions, lives in a Medicare paid for nursing home where she shares a room with a parade of roommates and receives very spotty and inadequate medical care. Her food is served erratically and is usually cold, and she often has to wait for hours for help with her basic needs, like bathing, and most importantly bathroom functions, but she is very stoic and naturally cheerful and has made the best of her situation, but it is not an enviable or deserved life. Both Mom and Aunt Bel have been blessed with good memories and clear thinking, but the onset of dementia is something they both fear.

Which kind of care awaits us?

I have always enjoyed the time leading up to Christmas. I like to see all of the decorations and lights of the season. Denver is an especially beautiful city on a winter’s eve which makes us even happier that we decided to move here a decade ago.

As a child I can remember poring over the Spiegel catalog for hours, sometimes with my siblings, but often on my own, looking at the toys and clothes being offered and marking the pages to show my parents exactly what Santa should bring, since the Spiegel catalog was what Santa used to let children and their parents know exactly what was available.

Christmas must have been very stressful for my folks, since they had very little money to spend on the holiday–thus the Spiegel catalog. I found out much later that they could buy things on credit, long before the ubiquity of credit cards we know today, and then make monthly payments.

It takes us days to decorate the apartment and trim the tree–not because we have that much to put up, but because we need to take lots of breaks to finish the task. We especially like the homemade ornaments that Bryn, Erin, and, more recently,Charlie have made as well as those that friends and family have crocheted, sewn, knitted, drawn, carved, and molded and gifted us through the years.

I used to be a snob about having a real tree; and when the children were little I insisted we search out a live tree and lug it home. Then invariably, we kept it up until all of the needles began to fall off, creating a cleaning disaster. Now I am quite content to pull out the artificial tree, complete with its own lights, from its box. This year I discovered that some of the lights weren’t working. Fortunately, a quick run to the Ace Hardware around the block remedied that.

I am also very partial to the nacimientos we have collected over the years.

Of course the best part of any season is the time we get to spend with our family, and especially Charlie, who is growing up all too fast. On most Tuesdays, we pick him up (more often than not with his bestie Dylan). Recently, with the arrival of winter, the city has re-opened the downtown ice rink just a couple of blocks from us.

The boys love the opportunity to race around the rink. Sue and I just enjoy watching them and how much they revel in being with one another. A couple of weeks ago, the rink was open with only a few other skaters, and the weather was so mild that the guys skated in short sleeves.